Before I begin, you’ll notice that you had to sign in this time. That’s because I wanted to make this blog private, so that only those I invite will be able to read and comment on it. So that’s what’s happening there. If you know of someone I forgot that needs and invite, then let me know! Now, without further ado, I give you the latest excursion into whimsy!
We all must eventually appeal to that only child we all know…
My friend Robin is an only child. Because Robin is SUCH and only child, I’m forced to write this update sooner than later so she well stop admonishing me from another continent. Therefore, to appease the cranky woman I’ve known for all these years, I bring you…
A whimsical tale of development and awkward inquiries:
(Stop complaining, Forner.)
I’m currently in Georgetown for my three-month reconnect. That means after three months of being out on our own as Official Peace Corps Volunteers, our entire group is staying in a hotel for a weeklong session of training/meetings. The first two months at site were relatively uneventful. The third month, however, has kept this spry young buck up on his whimsical toes.
As I mentioned in my previous post, I’ve taken another job teaching anatomy and physiology. Well, this has been not only a substantial amount of work, but also the primary focus of my time here. In case you missed it, I, Anthony Paul Burden, Peace Corps Volunteer and occasional stainer of worldly fabrics, have essentially become the anatomy and physiology department attached to the local hospital. The entire anatomy and physiology class is a four month program. When I walked on this job, there were only 5 weeks remaining. Of the 14 units on the curriculum, the class had only progressed to unit 3. I crammed most of the material into the remaining 4 weeks. I was essentially given free reign of the material. Which is great, because all lectures, course materials, and exams are written and controlled by me. This has been an enjoyable challenge. I have this magical and optimistic idea that nurses should have a basic understanding of human anatomy and physiology. Call me a dreamer, but it’s true. The whole nursing school program is three years. I work with the first year students. However, the second and third years I’ve had conversations with have very, very little knowledge on either subject. When I inquired as to why that was, they informed me that the second and third year groups had the anatomy and physiology class, but no actual teacher. They were instead given the same classroom time, and a few books, then told simply to “learn the material.” So once I’ve finished with the first years and this semester, I’ve requested that I be able to do some extra classes with the older groups. This has been tentatively approved, and hopefully these nurses will graduate with some idea of what muscles and bones go where and how they work! After the final, I’m scheduled to sit down and meet with the other teachers and go over the curriculum, and have been asked to provide opinions and insight into any potential changes to make the material flow more smoothly. I have some big plans for this program, and cannot wait to see what options are available.
I really enjoy the job, it’s not only a good use of my time and knowledge, but rewarding as well. Not to mention I’ve probably heard some of the best and most awkward questions since starting that job. Here are some of my favorites (see also: the ones I can remember.)
On my first day, there were the standard questions that I get from every Guyanese that I meet:
“Are you married?”
“Why not?”
“Do you have kids?”
“You don’t want kids?”
“Well do you have a girlfriend?”
“What about a Guyanese girlfriend?”
After that inquisition was satisfied, they then had to know how old I was. A wave of shock and awe spread across the room when I informed that I was only 24, and therefore one of the youngest people at the school. As I was about to leave, one girl raises her hand and waves me over to her desk. “Yeah, what’s up?” I say. She motions me down closer, and by her face I can tell this is going to be one of THOSE questions. One not intended for the ears of others. Already committed since walking over to her desk, I reluctantly lean down, and she asks “Sir…I was wondering…Do you date students?” And her eyes looked up all full of hope and excitement. Unable to hide my overall amusement, I responded with “No, as your teacher, that would be an ethical dilemma.” I’m not sure if she understood that whole concept, but had to get the hell outta dodge!
Before I continue, I must point out that all my students call me “sir.” It makes me feel a bit old, but that’s how the education system is here. Anyway, here are some more great questions and my smart ass responses. These are all questions I was really, truly asked.
Q: “Sir, can I have your eyes?”
A: “Sure. When I’m done with them.”
Q: “But you’ll be dead!”
A: “Exactly.”
This one took place after lecture.
Q: “Sir? Could I make a small request?”
A: “Sure. What do you need?”
Q: “Could you not move so much when you lecture?”
A: “Um…Ok, but what for?”
Her actual response: “Because I’m having trouble drawing you.”
She then proceeds to show me her notebook, where I saw a portrait of myself, but no facial features. Apparently, faces are hard to draw while the subject is on the move. I was super excited to find out that instead of learning the material, she had been doodling. To the surprise of no one, she hasn’t performed too well on the tests so far.
Just last week, a student called me over to ask a question. As I leaned down to explain the material, a girl sitting immediately to my right leaned away from me, and pulled up a camera. As I turned to ask if she was indeed trying to take my picture, she slid the camera back underneath her desk and feigned ignorance.
Probably my favorite of all time:
Q: “Sir, why isn’t my hair all cute and blonde like yours?”
A: “Well, without getting into the genetics of it…That’s because your parents are black.”
I now spend Tuesdays, Wednesdays, and Thursdays at the nursing college. It has become my primary focus, as well as a place that has long term potential for the duration of my stay in Guyana. I still work at the clinic, but now they only see me on Mondays and Fridays. My boss at the clinic and I have started up a specialty clinic for the elderly, since that is the largest demographic in the immediate vicinity of the clinic. It will focus on nutrition and dietary choices, as well as food preparation and regular exercise. Both hypertension and diabetes are practically endemic to the area, so we plan on focusing on those two issues.
So I’ve been out of communication for a few weeks now, in part due to lack of internet access, and in part to being extremely busy. These five months have flown by, but only in retrospect. One of the strangest things about being here is that days seem to go by slowly, but months just fall off the calender. Overall, I’m still enjoying my time. I probably spend more time with locals than I do with other volunteers. I’ve been adopted by a family in the neighborhood, and I hang out over there a lot. The mother, Lisa, her daughter, Delicia and I cook all the time. The grandfather, Dick, is a bit of a gearhead and we discuss motorcycles and engines all the time. He even brought out an old photo album, and showed me picture of he and his friends riding their old Hondas into Suriname in the early 60s. Then just a few weeks ago, one of the guys who drives me to work saw me out in the market, and said he wanted to show me something. He came and picked me up the following Saturday, and drove me up to this area of land he had just purchased to begin farming. It was beautiful, with lush jungle and a creek running through it. We then proceeded to plant some mango trees. The people here have been extremely friendly and welcoming since I first got here, but now that I have several local friends, I feel even more at home.
Well I think this update has been long enough. No more complaining, Robin.
All the best,
Tony
